Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Bitter Tulips

The rapid transition from winter to summer is bringing out my most schizoid personality traits. It doesn't help that I'm supposed to be in this serious business mindset in the final few weeks of the semester and all I can do is reflect on how little I've gotten out of my $chooling this year.

It was a little unnerving to be offered nine fucken dollars an hour at a part-time job this summer, which is less than I made making sandwiches--without a college degree. And when I hang out with My Friend, we get off on these tangents talking about the real value of our education and how it's pretty much just a big-ticket buy-in to the world of credibility for people who don't know how to create their own credibility and right-of-way.

Then, today I find out that some shmuck who was on our newspaper staff at SF State just won the fucken Pulitzer Prize. Okay, shmuck is a harsh word and to be honest, the extent of my interactions with Jose were pretty much limited to getting tanked at Joxer Daly's Thursday nights, but bitterness is just one schizo feeling that comes out in the spring, just like the tulips. More than hearing that my former classmates are married, having children, and taking adult vacations to Aruba, seeing him in a jacket and tie with the word Pulitzer Prize in the near vicinity really made me wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.

I think I'm just feeling fed up because school is particularly annoying this week, and in fact as I write this, I'm actually in Hour 4 of a 10-hour group meeting, one of those group meetings that makes you want to, as My Friend puts it, "take a bath with a toaster."

Other than that, life is just dandy!

The Lose Your Shit party Saturday night was really fun. I danced, danced, danced until 4 in the morning, after playing some primo pinball and air hockey at Manitoba's on the Lower East Side. That bar was full of nice young men, and drinks weren't too pricey either. Looking for cute boys? Go to where the bar games are...

3 comments:

Karim Amara said...

Ignore his honor. He only got it because he's a minority and gay.

Papagayo said...

be patient with yourself and what you get darling... it's better that way, no? isn't yours on its way?

Muffin said...

I totally had a dream last night that someone was trying to hire me for $9/hr...get out of my head!