Monday, December 8, 2008

happy distractions from stress

I have been so damn good this week, nay, this MONTH. Tomorrow is my one-month anniversary of being drug-and-alcohol free.

How does one celebrate without drugs and alcohol? God, what a conundrum. I can't even think about it. Tomorrow I just hope that at the end of the day I will somehow end up passed out like this corgi:

So what if he looks stiff like a board, at least he's unconscious. And smiling. And fuzzy. And--unless that's his paw, I think he's got a hard-on.

I'm going to be done with $chool in about 52 hours. I can't believe it! I've been charging through everything so hard. It's kind of crazy. I've been writing-bullshitting-researching pretty hard for the last week. This is what finals week is like. Thank god I'm on this marvelous drug cocktail or I think I would have lost my mind.

There are other things that are making me happy right now. In the absence of the extreme releases of stress caused by boozing, I am experiencing this structural shift in my brain to contenting myself with prolonged contentment instead of instant gratification. It's pretty stressful because instant gratification is so fucken great, right? I've kind of gotten grossly addicted to bikram yoga recently, which isn't gross in and of itself, but gross because it's kind of expensive to do it, and kind of a pain in the ass, with mats and towels, and they'll charge you for everything, even water. But I've become addicted to the high, because...that's all I have left in life. (bwahahaha.)

I am also super addicted to Joe lately, which is a really crazy prolonged high that I will have to explain sometime, because after all these months I've suddenly realized how great he is and it is both awesome and disconcerting. Let's just stick with awesome for the time being. I got to see him for a minute this weekend and he made me go "aw..." inside because of something so simple. When he saw me he said something like, "Hey, that's the shirt you were wearing when I first met you."

I'm excited to see him in about 52 hours, when all of this $chool shit is over.

K lucho, feed me. I'm starved.


Papagayo said...

work it out!

Papagayo said...

work it out! proud of you and happy for you!